Detox

I want and also believe I need a detox. I just read this article and am really motivated now. I've done day-long ones before when I ate fruits only and that's what I'll probably do now as well. As for the yoga practice on that day, I could do one of the yoga practices from Seane Corn's Detox Flow Yoga in the morning, and then the Liver practice from Sarah Power's Insight Yoga. :-) I'd like to do it on a day when I'm working in the office, so that I don't think of food the whole day and have to make sure that I eat enough, so that I don't start shaking or something. I read somewhere that it's good that such fruit-only days should be done regularly on weekly basis (that is, one day every week). Yes, maybe I'll do it tomorrow or on Friday...

Today I didn't get up as early as yesterday, but still had about an hour time for Yoga Mind & Body with Erich Schiffmann. It was probably in February the last time when I practiced in the mornings somewhat regularly (and then switched again to an evening practice) so I can't really remember if I also felt so stiff then. But now I'm being really gentle and attentive to myself, which I think is ultimately a good thing and I believe that my body is also very slowly adapting to a morning practice again. The other thing I noticed is that I have difficulties with the balancing poses - tree or half moon, etc, and was wondering if it's a morning thing or because of the dimmed lights? Probably the lights though...

Early morning

I love early mornings. The problem is that I'm somewhat of a "night owl" or simply restless and have troubles going to bed early enough. Though maybe it's just a habit that can be changed. Last night I went to bed around 22:45 h and this morning got up at 5:30. So I should have more than 6 hours of sleep. I don't think it's enough, but I can't imagine going to bed before 22:30h. I wanted to do a different practice than yesterday, but was pressed for time and couldn't decide quickly so just went with Erich Schiffmann's Beginner Yoga again. It was good. Calm and peaceful. I noticed that I actually feel stiff mostly when doing forward bends. Maybe if I did some more sun saluts in the beginning it would've felt better? I will try it tomorrow and see how it goes. My breath was deeper and longer than normal, maybe because it was so early and I was really paying attention, but several times I was slower than Erich's count because of that.

I also sat yesterday for 5 minutes before bed (used this online mindfulness bell). Just sat there with my eyes open and tried to concentrate on the outbreath, label my thoughts and let them go. It was not easy and my "monkey mind" jumped from one thought to the other. :-)

Meditation

So, I've been listening to Kino MacGregor's Podcasts, and I have to say that I LOVE them. My favorite are probably the Zurich Talk on Yoga Part 2, where she answers with a nice story to a question from a lawyer and Meditation Talk - Episode I. So I've been thinking about trying again to sit. I've tried before - the Candle meditation from Dharma Mittra's DVD, Pema Chödrön etc., but it never lasted long. Anyway, what's important is that I try again and again. :-)

Bow and knee joint

For the first time since months I managed to get up at 5 and do yoga before going to work. I wanted something relaxed and did Erich Schiffmann's Beginning Yoga. I was really stiff but had a nice practice nonetheless. Didn't turn on the lights but had only the screen of my laptop on so it was really peaceful.

I thought I must be somehow not "normal" because I have this strange feeling in the knees while doing bow or bridge. But I checked Anatomy of Hatha Yoga and it seems it's quite normal, because the knee joint is simply not made to be used in positions like this. So, again, patience is needed until the connective tissue capsules of the knee joints get tough enough so that one can get higher in the pose.

Signed up!

Oh, and I already got my confirmation - I'll be going to the "Burning Karma" workshop with Max Strom!

The body contains our vikarma. (negative karma, and negative inherent tendencies) Yoga burns vikarma and harmonizes our system, then craving, grasping, and wanting begin to recede. This unique practice is designed to ignite the strength and energy of the body and the courage of the heart. This class is both challenging and very healing and is open to all levels. It will include a short talk, vinyasa-flow, non-dogmatic philosophy, breathing, and meditation.

Have to read more about anatomy

I've diagnosed myself with flat feet - my arches are weak, so they collapse and my knees are turned inward (article). I guess this would also explain why I feel like I feel in bridge - the muscles on the inner side of my legs are weaker so I get unequal pull on both sides of my knees. I can't really explain it and I'll have to read more about it.

Then, the sensitivity in my low back that I wrote about yesterday - I've been wondering if it's not actually my sacrum? And caused not by wheel or camel but by the lunges? Again, I may be using th wrong terminology here, but I feel that I'm pretty flexible when it comes to a sideward (outward?) movement of my hips, which, when in a deep lunge without the hips leveled could lead to unneeded pressure on the lower back and the sacrum. I have to read more (maybe this one and Anatomy of Hatha Yoga).

Am I not paying enough attention?

So I did the Day 3 practice and really enjoyed it. I guess it's my favorite from the 5. I tried to really take it easy and not push too hard. There are a lot of lunges to prepare for the backbends and although I do use a blanket below my knees it still feels a little uncomfortable. So this is one thing I have to be careful about. The second is that after the practice my lower back feels a little sensitive. I'm not sure if this is normal or I'm again going too far? I really don't think I did too much. Maybe because of my knees I didn't pay enough attention on my low back during lunges? I must say that the practice is perfectly sequenced - plenty of preparation and then release of the back and relaxation. So the only thing that could go wrong is if one is not listening to and respecting their own body.

An article & workshops

A little after I wrote the post yesterday I read an article by Kino Macgregor - Finding Lifelong Inspiration In Yoga. I so much recognized the same patterns she describes in my "relationship" with yoga. So I guess it's quite normal. Sometimes you can't get enough of your practice and sometimes you have to drag yourself on the mat. Sometimes you feel the flow, and sometimes you're stiff. But the magic is working anyways so you just have to persevere. I guess this is the real challenge for me. I'm probably the most impatient person in the world. I'm also one who is used to learning things quickly and was quite good at sports in school. And now there's yoga, and things are not happening as fast as I wish. :-)

I was thinking about going to some of Ana Forrest's workshops in Berlin, but unfortunately it's going to get really expensive with flight and hotel, so I'll not be able to do it. Hopefully I will get a chance to meet her one day. On the other hand, Max Strom will also be having some workshops in Zurich, right before my birthday. This will also be interesting. :-) I didn't know much about him, so I googled his name and found a video on YouTube and a talk on his website.

Ok, enough rambling. I'm going to do Day 3 from Ana's Intensives now. I tried to shorten it a bit but it didn't really work. I just think the practice is perfectly sequenced as it is - one pose prepares you for the next. So it's backbending for me today.

Hard

I just did Day 2 from from Ana Forrest's Intensive Workshop. And it was so hard, I almost lost heart. I've been doing Yoga daily for a little more than a year now and probably subconsciously have been expecting to be able to do the most fancy asanas by now. Although I know that this is not the goal of yoga and not why I have started doing it as well. I had a period when I almost lost my desire to do yoga and really did only the minimum I could convince myself to do. Now the desire is coming back and I remembered why I love yoga so much but my body feels so weak. I've been doing Erich Schiffmann's Beginning Yoga and maybe that's what I need. To slow down a bit and not rush to get more advanced. I also think that Ana Forrest and Erich Schiffmann are similar in a way. They both teach to find the pleasure in each pose and move slowly and go deep. I was wondering, is there a way to adjust the 2 hour practice from Ana's Workshop so that I can fit it in days when I'm too tired and short of time (during the week because of my job)? Maybe just squeeze whatever I have time for between the opening part (usually the first about 30 min) and the closing poses? We'll see.

Getting back on the mat

In the last 2 months I've been strugling to get on my yoga mat. I was too busy, too tired, not feeling good, too hungry, there were too many other things that were more interesting at the moment... So I did skip a day or two in a row. Often. And decided that it's better to do something lighter than nothing. I was at a point where I almost thought that if I didn't do 1.5-2 hours of yoga (Forrest or Power or whatever made me really sweat and feel every muscle), it wasn't worth it. And on some days I really wasn't up to such a challenge. So, I went back to Yoga Mind & Body. It's a 45-50 min very gentle practice and I had no excuse not to do it. I normally don't do yoga on music, but I really like the music here. And I was also lucky enough to do it on the balcony a few times when the weather was nice. It was so nice!! I had never done yoga outside before and I enjoyed it very much. Tried not to think about the neighbours who could see me. :-) What I also did on some days was just the intro (about 30 min) of any of the 5 practices from the Forrest Yoga 5 day intensives. Sometimes I really miss doing a stronger practice but I decided to not push it and give myself time. Main thing is that I'm still getting on my mat.